Do you know anyone who (for lack of a better example) mimics a chameleon, changing personalities instead of changing colors, depending upon who they are with and where they are?
These folks seem to “play a part” rather than be their true selves, when around others. Perhaps one is sitting in the same chair as you are in?
Most likely, you have met or known individuals who hide behind masks in order to get through the day. This has become a survival mechanism for them. The mask betrays the good-hearted human beings the world deserves to know. You might even have met or known people who, when faced with the opportunity to do a little self-reflection, need to talk about themselves in the third person, in order to get some perspective.
What most is needed is for these folks to be honest with themselves. That alarm in our minds that goes off when we are faking it, or being phony, is our conscience reminding us that we are going against who we really are. We are denying our true selves because we judge ourselves to be “less than” we should be. The challenge is, if we continue to deny our true selves, our mind adapts and the phony self we portray becomes the true self. And that’s OK, if the “act” we portray is who we really want to be. You see, our mind is that powerful. It pulls us to the strongest picture we hold.
If we truly do not like our character, then we can take action to change it. If need be, we go find individuals with the qualities that we want to have. We want to define these characteristics clearly, then go from admiration to assimilation, using the affirmation and visualization processes to change our internal pictures.
We do not need to portray anyone other than who we are. We have the freedom to make the choice of positive, contributive change when who we are isn’t who we want to be. We are enough, right now, to get started on this path and succeed in uncovering our honest, true selves. If that’s still not quite where we want to be, we can always tweak. Lifelong growing is a noble goal.